Of Love, Loss & 2020

2018 was shit.

2019 was bigger bollocks.

Personal trials, professional black holes, loss of relationships, speed breakers and chasms of depression at every junction. And I wasn’t the only one blaming two random years for a culmination of bad decisions and generally bad circumstances.

I mean, there was always the odd ray of sunshine. A gorgeous niece and a snowball of a nephew. My puppers, Max entered our lives to give our family unconditional love. We lay the foundations of our new business venture. There was some travel, which I love. And refocussing on family.

But that’s where it ended.

So in the last few months of 2019, I started my countdown towards the beginning of a new era. It was going to be the end of my bad patch, flowers were going to bloom, rainbows, sunshine, unicorns……….

2020, laid it on me hard within the first 20 days.

I lost my granddad, my darling.

The man who celebrated the birth of his grand-daughter like no one else in his generation. He loved all his grandkids like no other granddad I knew. We were taken on vacations, taken to see his work place, for dinners, public meetings…… he couldn’t be more proud of his little flock.

He thrived in the chaos created when the whole family was around. Kids yelling and jumping, his son in laws sharing a drink with him, his children by his side. He never asked us to tone it down, he would just clap his hands and laugh loudly at our antics.

He was a father figure to my dad. A mentor and a confidante to a man he was immensely proud of. You could see it in his eyes, every time he spoke of my dad, and spoke to my dad, there was love, admiration & pride. And I see that as such a rare quality in relationships now.

What he left us with, are my lessons and goals. Not just for 2020, but going forward.

  1. Love your family. Unequivocally. Love them for their quirks & for their habits that irritate you. Love them because they are yours for keeps.
  2. Forgive. Give second chances, give third chances. People make mistakes, big ones, bad ones, unforgiveable ones. But you have been given the power to forgive, do that and move on, and you’ll find yourself happy times million.
  3. Don’t give up. Until you don’t try you can’t succeed. Until you don’t fail, you won’t learn. Keep your chin up buttercup.
  4. Help everyone you can. The good vibes always come back.
  5. Travel. It’s food for your soul. Expand your horizons, learn something new, the way you see the world will change. Go have an adventure.
  6. Live fearlessly. The meek will not rule the earth. (Dad, if you’re reading this, this one is 100% you)
  7. Love what you do. Do what you love. Cliched, but ever since I adopted this, I love coming to work.
  8. Change. Always for the better. Accept and love your flaws, but always strive to improve yourself.
  9. Filter. Weed out the bad, hold the good even closer. Value the process, it’ll teach you so much about yourself.
  10. Always move forward. Don’t let your past hold you back or pull you down.


This is my list, my inheritance if you will.

I hope you have yours to make 2020 invincible.

I’ll miss you a lot nana. Thank you for being with us.

Forever in our hearts.


3 thoughts on “Of Love, Loss & 2020

  1. Madhu

    Thank you for writing this tribute to your nana. It brought tears of happiness, love and joy because it is so beautifully expressed. That is a relationship of grandfather and grandchild that is not given its due!

    Liked by 1 person

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